Wednesday, September 7, 2016

Loose Cannon Fodder #35 [09.02.16]

For me, and probably most other people, Raw really felt like a blur this week because I was just waiting for the main event to see who was crowned the second ever WWE Universal Champion.   There was a match where Dana Brooke teamed with Anderson & Gallows to take on New Day and Bayley, but one aspect of it which was funny to me was that they went to commercial and when they came back they showed a shot of the announce table with Michael Cole spewing some nonsense... While the match... Was still... Going on... In the ring.    Do we watch these shows for the wrestling or to see the wrestling in the background while people talk?   Seriously.   Chris Jericho defeated Neville, Nia Jax defeated another jobber and Sami Zayn even defeated Jinder Mahal but all of those matches were cut for the Hulu replay.   As were Braun Strowman defeating another jobber and Darren Young defeating Titus O'Neil, and really, I have no idea what's going on in the former Prime Time Players' storyline, but hey, I get to hear Paul Heyman talk about Brock Lesnar with Stephanie McMahon so that makes it all better, right?   Oh, and I'm already over this Sheamus-Cesaro series of matches.   Just let Sheamus sweep Cesaro so they can go onto other feuds now.   Not that Sheamus feels like a contender to any title.

In the main event, Big Cass was eliminated first and then HHH cost Roman Reigns his spot, then turned on Seth Rollins and basically gave the win to Kevin Owens.   I'm okay with Kevin Owens winning with help from HHH because it just means that Kevin Owens won.   Imagine AJ Styles defeating Dean Ambrose for the WWE Championship and the two top guys are Owens and Styles.   Wow.   WWE will have come so far if that becomes true, not to mention Nakamura leading NXT.    I just feel like Seth Rollins was the obvious choice to win and therefore it would have made Raw too predictable and I'm just ready to see where they go with Kevin Owens as champion.   If not Seth Rollins, who would be the first contender for the title?   A face I suppose, and I'd almost want to choose Cesaro if he wasn't tied up with Sheamus.    Neville could get his due here finally and maybe even this might somehow lead to Sami Zayn fighting Kevin Owens again.   Who knows.   But I'm really excited for what this means for Raw, with this now being the Kevin Owens Show and all.  

After Raw we watched Smack Down! mainly because I wanted to see the Headbangers return (yes, really).    The Hype Bros. advanced in the tag team tournament over The Vaudevillains somehow.   AJ Styles defeated Apollo Crews in a match I would like to see headline a PPV should AJ Styles win the title from the somewhat directionless Dean Ambrose.   Randy Orton accepted a challenge to face Bray Wyatt.   The team of Natalya and Alexa Bliss defeated Becky Lynch and Naomi while Nikki Bella was on commentary and no one cared.    Heath Slater and Rhyno did defeat the Headbangers, which was sad, but I hope they do return and this wasn't just a one time thing.   And in the main event Baron Corbin defeated Dean Ambrose via DQ.   After the match, Ambrose had Styles in the ring and he had him on the ropes crotch first and kind of played around with that a bit too much-- it was a bit over the top and really just became embarrassing more than anything else.

Also, I forgot to mention that The Miz opened the show by running his mouth which brought out Dolph Ziggler who will now challenge The Miz for the IC Title.   Is anyone else on Smack Down!, you know, actually paying attention to this nonsense?   Where are Baron Corbin and Apollo Crews, guys like that, to speak up when you need them most??    How does it make any sense that Dolph Ziggler can LOSE to Dean Ambrose in his title opportunity and then somehow he is rewarded with an IC title shot?   I'd be upset about that if I was on Smack Down! but apparently I'm the only one who cares.

There was also this rather awkward segment with Heath Slater and Rhyno that I'd really rather just forget.

It was also revealed this week that Alberto Del Rio is once again done with WWE.   He said he was promised main level pushes and since he has been back he won the U.S. Title while paired with Zeb Coulter for some reason which made absolutely no sense and then he went into the League of Nations which was just nonsense.     Sheamus and Rusev are the only LON members left now, as it appears that also drove Wade Barrett away.   Still, I've always liked Alberto Del Rio better outside of WWE so I'm more interested in seeing where he goes next than wishing he'd stay with WWE.

Interestingly enough, this week's episode of NXT opened with a match where Tye Dillinger defeated Buddy Murphy and it felt like a decent amount of time, like they really wanted to showcase these two talents.   I also really enjoyed this match because it felt like you didn't know who might win because they could finally start the singles push of Buddy Murphy- who had his chance to win a few times- and yet this also could have been the push for Tye Dillinger, which it seemed to be.   So I just like matches like this-- where they're given a decent amount of tv time and feel as if either person could win.   Definitely match of the night to kick off this show.

In a strange backstage segment which came into the ring, The Revival beat up Tommaso Ciampa as Johnny Gargano was at home nursing an injury (aka finishing up his indie dates).    I feel like this should result in Ciampa finding a new partner to take on The Revival, but I think it's really just going to further the heel turn by Ciampa as he will likely use this as a reason why he will turn on Gargano and, well, heel Ciampa could honestly be NXT Champion so why not go with that, right??
Steve Cutler defeated Kenneth Crawford and for the record, yes, I was saying some time ago that Steve Cutler is former military and therefore his character pretty much writes itself and he should thus have a stronger television role and all of that.   This match just further proved that.

There was a backstage segment at some point where it looks like Austin Aries is going to face the former La Sombra, which I'm cool with.    Hideo Itami also cut a promo about kicking Austin Aries with his sockless loafers and it was a lot funnier than it should have been.    Whoever does commentary for NXT that isn't Corey Graves also said he'd be interviewing Asuka next week and I hope that means she will kick him in the head.

No Way Jose defeated Angelo Dawkins but I'm really kind of starting to like Angelo Dawkins.   Guys like Dawkins, Tye Dillinger, Steve Cutler and even Kenneth Crawford I feel have been in NXT so long it's time to give them their chance to either sink or swim as I feel most of them will rise to the top.  

In a completely opposite statement to that, we have Liv Morgan defeating Aliyah.   First off, Aliyah came out trying to look like a cat somehow and if this doesn't end with her getting the ever-loving shit beaten out of her by Cat Power then someone must sue for gimmick infringement.    Then there is Liv Morgan from New Jersey and even Corey Graves hating on Jersey couldn't save this match.    This was one of the worst displays I have ever seen inside of a ring and I watched that TNA Knockouts PPV where Botchamania keeps using Shelly Martinez clips to show how bad her match was.    I'm not sure why WWE is so invested in Aliyah (Who is she blackmailing?) but if this isn't proof that she should be fired immediately I don't know what is.   This was a garbage match, plain and simple, and it had no business on this show.   This should have NEVER made it to television.   Especially when NXT has other women with so much talent.

Our main event saw Shinsuke Nakamura come out and declare this the era of Strong Style.    For me, I feel like a lot of people who are "main roster ready" in NXT are already on the main roster except for let's say Samoa Joe.    So, if Samoa Joe has a rematch against Nakamura and loses, then he could show up on the main roster.   But right now, Mick Foley signed Bayley as the "hottest free agent" somehow, so he could just as easily (or Smack Down! could) sign Bobby Roode or Austin Aries or Hideo Itami or whoever else you might feel is main roster ready without them defeating Shinsuke Nakamura.   I'd really like to see Nakamura have a long reign with the NXT Title and be the gatekeeper of sorts, only to surrender the title when he goes to the main roster.    I'd love to see a heel Ciampa vs. Nakamura, Gargano vs. Nakamura, Roode vs. Nakamura, the former La Sombra vs. Nakamura, Itami vs. Nakamura... Yeah, and then we get some CWC guys in NXT and we're set.   NXT is going to be the place to be when the CWC comes to its end.

And I just found out today that Lucha Underground Season 3 is beginning next week.   So, Lucha Underground Season 2 ended when the CWC started and now it's returning while the CWC is still ongoing.    Also, my biggest hype right now: Paul London will be in Season 3 of Lucha Underground!!   I'm so excited it's not even funny.  

IMPACT opened this week with a video of The Hardyz singing the "Obsolete" theme song and it was actually kind of funny.    Then we cut into the arena where Mike Bennett and Lashley fought over who Moose liked better, which was a pretty weird sight to see.   In the first match of the night Matt Hardy defeated Crazzy Steve but after the match Crazzy Steve said that Rosemary kidnapped the Baby Hardy, which lead to a lot of promos of us seeing the Hardy Family Ranch and that everything was pretty much fine there.

The second match saw DJ Z defeat Trevor Lee, Andrew Everett, Mandrews and Rock Star Spud in an Ultimate X Gauntlet match to become the new X Division Champion.   I actually like the way DJ Z has been handled lately so I think he was the right choice to go with here for champion.   Also, can we just assume Tigre Uno is done with TNA at this point??

Eli Drake and EC3 have a promo inside the ring and then so does Drew Galloway, who basically blames the fans for him turning on them and Aron Rex.  I just wish he blamed Aron Rex's stupid new name instead.    This seems like a lot of talking and then eventually Eli Drake has a match against EC3 which of course EC3 wins because he's going on to face Lashley for the title at Bound for Glory (which I feel should have happened by now) and Eli Drake will likely drag the King of the Mountain Title out of the trash next week.  

Also, there is sort of a match as Maria makes Allie lay down for her and Maria becomes the new KO Champion.   Yeah... Remember when the Knockouts were better than the Divas in WWE?   Now WWE has changed from "Divas" to "Women" and TNA is pulling these types of things you'd expect from the Divas Division.   Why can't both shows just have great womens wrestling at the same time?   (Of course we all know this must lead to Gail Kim winning the title from Maria which is so boring and predictable I just want to read the results and stop watching/writing about TNA altogether)

The main event saw Lashley defeat Mike Bennett because not only should Mike Bennett not be TNA Champion but Lashley still needs to defend against EC3 whenever Bound for Glory is.    After the match, Mike Bennett kind of bossed around Moose and slapped him I think.    This all ended with Moose basically turning on Mike Bennett, which should get him over with the fans but I just wonder why they waited these few weeks and didn't just bring Moose in as a face straight away or wait until Bound for Glory to create a bigger- if you'll pardon the pun- impact.   

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