When
I first moved to Texas, Ume was one of the first bands that I heard about,
listened to and really sought out to like because they were that good. Now here I am, some odd years later, living
back in Connecticut, and Ume still exists.
I mean, I didn’t expect the state of Texas to stop moving because I left
because it is kind of deflating when you realize you probably missed an awesome
album release show.
This
makes me miss a lot about Texas in terms of music, but then it brings to mind a
dream I had recently. I was in either a
sort of hospital, either legal or mental, and it looked like a cafeteria. Everyone was dressed the same, sitting at
tables and making pictures out of those little hollow plastic beads.
A
woman, whom I assume was in charge of this room, asked me where I was
from. I stumbled through my complicated
answer I have been known to give for the past year or so:
“Well,
I’m from Connecticut originally, but I spent nearly ten years in Texas, but now
I’m back in CT”.
I
was then told something very clearly that I remembered when I woke up and still
remember to this day, obviously. She
said to me, she asked, how could I find peace within when I wasn’t even sure
where I was from? Perhaps to stop some
of my inner conflicts I needed to choose one place instead of feeling torn
between the two.
This
was brilliant and a manifestation of my subconscious, but still, I knew what I
needed to do. Though I haven’t had any
grand revelations otherwise because I’m not going to end this story by saying
that I chose one and feel better for it because I’m not ready to do that. I’ll live with the struggle for now if it
means getting to keep both pieces of me.
The
thing is, I know I’m ultimately going to have to accept that I live in CT now
since I’m here for the foreseeable future.
One day I might get to that
place, sure. But right now, this album
just has me really missing Texas.
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